Being Anti-Social

I’ve come to the realization that I can be a pretty anti-social person.  I realize that I’m not the only person around who can be anti-social but to those who know me it probably seems really contradictory for me to believe myself to be anti-social.  When I’m around my friends I’m always chatting, laughing, making jokes, etc.  I’m the freakin’ life of the party sans lamp shade.  I’m rarely afraid to walk up to people I don’t know and start talking.  In my job there is a certain amount of extroversion that’s needed. 

However, it depends on the people and situation.  Recently, I had to spend a lot more time with a group of people I didn’t want to.  It’s not that they’re not nice people.  It’s that I don’t really like them.  I know that sounds like an oxymoron but they’re just not my type of people.  And perhaps, my dislike has something to do with how I feel when I’m around them.  I always feel like I’m back in high school and I’m the awkward geek stuck in a group project with all the popular/cool kids.  They’re all nice to me and don’t really hate me but they laughing at me and not with me.  When I’m with these people it seems there’s nothing I can really contribute to the conversations without sounding like a moron.  I don’t have anything in common with them.  

If you don't know who these guys are we can't be friends.

Now, when I’m with my friends or fellow geeks it’s a different story.  In my group I can say and do whatever comes to mind without fear of judgment.  And I do.  I’ve been known to string together a sentence with so many fucks in it that it’s cracked through the ozone layer.  I come up with ridiculously funny threats, like using a rusty stapler to staple a speeding ticket to a speeders forehead.  I can be sarcastic without fear of offending someone because they’re probably going to be sarcastic right back to me. 

And, I suppose that’s what this is really about.  No one is really anti-social or one hundred percent introverted.  A lot of it has to do with the company and the activity.  So, we all have moments when we have to spend time with people we don’t much like but the reward for this time spent is the knowledge that you’ll soon be able to join your group where you can fly your geek flag high.