90% -- 95%
I received my Master's degree in December 2011. In January 2012 I had some financial problems and my mother had a stroke. So, it hasn't been a good time. After about two months of being pissed off, regretting my decision to go back and get my master's and suffering from depression I decided to put my big girl panties on and take hold of my life.
In March, I decided that even though I was in a relatively secure job I couldn't continue to be a secretary for the university with an advanced degree. So, during Spring Break I spent two days applying to various English adjunct positions at Junior colleges. By the end of March I'd received a response and set up an interview.
The interview turned out to not really be an interview as much as a drop down a rabbit hole. I walked in and the head of the department said, "Right, well let me get your new hire paperwork and well take a quick tour of the building." And that's what we did. It was surreal and a gift.
However, gifts rarely come without their own problems. In this case, I will be losing half my annual salary if I take the position. This means I will have to find additional classes to teach at different colleges. So, far I haven't had much luck and last month (May) I created a Plan B which consisted of applying as a substitute teacher for the two school districts in my area. However, they won't be taking applications until July. This means that I'm basically sitting on my hands for the rest of this month and then hoping, praying and making empty promises in the hopes of landing a substitute position. Then I have to hope that they call me on a regular basis.
I've started to realize that I may have to resort to a Plan C...working as a clerk at a Walmart or some such place. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with working this type of job. It's good honest work but when you've worked at a University and had students look up to you the last thing you want them to see is you working at Walmart. It says that even if you work hard and get a degree you don't go anywhere except back to Walmart. And yes, my pride would hurt.
So, I am about 85-90% sure I am going to take the position. I have to make a decision by August 1 which adds to the pressure. I know that if I want to go on to get my doctorate I'll need a fellowship and a teaching assistant-ship in order to afford the tuition. The only way I can get one is if I have some sort of teaching/adjunct experience on my CV. I wasn't a traditional graduate student meaning I wasn't a graduate assistant which is the component I need. Being an adjunct would help fill that missing space. In addition, being given a job on CV alone, especially my CV which is mostly fluff is rarely if ever heard of and turning down the job is suicide. It would probably mean I'd be blacklisted.
However, taking it means even less finical stability than I already have and having grown up poor I harbor a deep fear of going back to living without electric or water for months at a time. I swore when I "grew-up" and was on my own I'd never let that happen. If it did I don't think I could bear it.
It's frustrating to vacillate so much when I have always been a person who can weigh the options and make a decision in a timely manner. There are too many "what-ifs" and unanswerable questions and concerns. And honestly, my future doesn't seem so bright right now.
In March, I decided that even though I was in a relatively secure job I couldn't continue to be a secretary for the university with an advanced degree. So, during Spring Break I spent two days applying to various English adjunct positions at Junior colleges. By the end of March I'd received a response and set up an interview.
The interview turned out to not really be an interview as much as a drop down a rabbit hole. I walked in and the head of the department said, "Right, well let me get your new hire paperwork and well take a quick tour of the building." And that's what we did. It was surreal and a gift.
However, gifts rarely come without their own problems. In this case, I will be losing half my annual salary if I take the position. This means I will have to find additional classes to teach at different colleges. So, far I haven't had much luck and last month (May) I created a Plan B which consisted of applying as a substitute teacher for the two school districts in my area. However, they won't be taking applications until July. This means that I'm basically sitting on my hands for the rest of this month and then hoping, praying and making empty promises in the hopes of landing a substitute position. Then I have to hope that they call me on a regular basis.
I've started to realize that I may have to resort to a Plan C...working as a clerk at a Walmart or some such place. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with working this type of job. It's good honest work but when you've worked at a University and had students look up to you the last thing you want them to see is you working at Walmart. It says that even if you work hard and get a degree you don't go anywhere except back to Walmart. And yes, my pride would hurt.
So, I am about 85-90% sure I am going to take the position. I have to make a decision by August 1 which adds to the pressure. I know that if I want to go on to get my doctorate I'll need a fellowship and a teaching assistant-ship in order to afford the tuition. The only way I can get one is if I have some sort of teaching/adjunct experience on my CV. I wasn't a traditional graduate student meaning I wasn't a graduate assistant which is the component I need. Being an adjunct would help fill that missing space. In addition, being given a job on CV alone, especially my CV which is mostly fluff is rarely if ever heard of and turning down the job is suicide. It would probably mean I'd be blacklisted.
However, taking it means even less finical stability than I already have and having grown up poor I harbor a deep fear of going back to living without electric or water for months at a time. I swore when I "grew-up" and was on my own I'd never let that happen. If it did I don't think I could bear it.
It's frustrating to vacillate so much when I have always been a person who can weigh the options and make a decision in a timely manner. There are too many "what-ifs" and unanswerable questions and concerns. And honestly, my future doesn't seem so bright right now.
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